You may have heard the news that Hostess, the maker of delectable calorie bombs Twinkies and Ding Dongs, has filed for bankruptcy. While our childhood is inextricably linked with the golden, soft cushion of cake incasing that warm, creamy center, we know now how metabolically mendacious Twinkies are. Despite their contribution to our sugar-heavy habits, Twinkies and Ding Dongs will always recall a time when lunchboxes held more than the day’s sustenance: It was a journey. You may have begun with bologna squeezed between two slices of white, velvety Wonder Bread, which you washed down with the contents of a small carton of milk. Then there was that apple that you tried to force on the weird kid who mumbled to himself and always wore the windbreaker in the lunchroom no matter the temperature or precipitation outside. He would usually take the apple, unable to mount a rejection, mostly because he was surprised by a moment of personal interaction with another human than with actually wanting to eat the apple. After getting that unpleasantness out of the way, you’d get to the treat. Usually my mom put a Ding Dong in my lunchbox, which I actually preferred. Ding Dongs also came with the bonus of salacious innuendo suggested by its name, which became a feature of post-pubescent junior high chatter. Ah, good times.

What I’m getting at is that we’re still a horribly obese country that spends billions on health-care because of our lousy fast-food diet. But I’m still sad Hostess is in retreat. Also, I miss my Star Trek lunchbox.

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